Showing posts with label points. Show all posts
Showing posts with label points. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

92 times and counting

One would hope that I add something to the world- be it good, bad, or indifferent- Me

Today I have burped 92 times, and I'm still going. I wonder how many times I will burp just while I am writing this blog post. Any guesses? It's worth 10 points!

If I were one of the funny, witty female writers that I admire so much i would be able to take this already amusing tale and spin it into a best selling novel. Are women born with this funny writing gene... how do I get it? can I take a class? can I study something or read something?

Here's my attempt at a funny account of my day:

--------*******----------*********

I woke up this morning, jolted awake at exactly 10 am by two thoughts: one, why hasn't my roommate, who can't move my shift car woken me up to get the car out of her way- G-d I hope she hasn't used her car to push mine out of the way again; two, a loud, ear-ringing, and terrible tasting, burp. What a brilliant moment. I think the gardeners must have heard me through the open window; I can only guess what they started yelling at each other and laughing about in Spanish....

I have decided that I can't live with this problem. If the doctor wants to laugh at me, I'll bring proof of my burping habits. I got out of bed, and while trying to scrounge for a notebook to record the number of burps I burped at least 10 more times. I lost count, it was definitely more fingers than I had available....

--------*******----------*********

Okay- I tried.... did you laugh? Be honest, I need feedback here people! Perhaps I'm trying to hard.

Of course, the moral of the story is that everyone gives me weird looks and I can't make it through a conversation with someone without burping. Today a football player gave me a dirty look. That's right, a FOOTBALL player. I've decided he was jealous!

Print Page