Thursday, February 8, 2007

Where is the depth of my life- or I am really just a shallow person

Looking through my words, my thoughts; I realize that I rarely ever go more than skin deep. Is it because I don't want the world to know that in reality I am terrified of myself, my words, my thoughts. To have all of the crazy feelings and emotions and thoughts. I don't even think that I WANT to be me. To have to sit for even a moment and consider the truth behind the things in my head- where would I be, what would that do to me?

to retreat from the bumby crazy convoluted road I can't seem to find or make or see. Are we all supposed to immediately know where the road should go? Am I the only one who is lost in the sea of opinion. where should the period go- because honestly I don't think I know anymore. How can it go at the end, when I am positive that I have no end to the world to the thoughts to the emotions to the feelings to the

3 comments:

Gridley said...
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Gridley said...

Ahem. For myself, life isn't a journey to a defined point. Life is an exploration. I can see a short way ahead with high (although not perfect) confidence. As I look further and further ahead, the future becomes more and more uncertain. I have some general goals, some interests, and some contingency plans (actually, I have a lot of those, but that's just me), but all I can be certain of is that there can be no certainty.

Sometimes I feel like I'm running away from my past. Sometimes I know I'm running away from parts of it. Some of the time I feel that I'm running towards the future - whatever it may hold.

cait said...

One of the most difficult thinkg I've started learning this year is that the time just out of school is about now knowing where the road will go. It's effing scary but it's not a personal failure. Anyone who claims to know? They are lying to you. Either that, or they are very short-sighted.

But I do know about not wanting to sit still with yourself. It's good for you to try it, though. Be brave!